4 ways to cope with losing your hair
Posted 01.07.16 | by
The most common reaction to losing your hair is panic. It’s normal and important to allow yourself to feel this. It’s what you do next that determines how you’re going to handle it. You can decide to let it take over your life or you can use that panic to fuel your recovery. When I’m talking about recovery, I mean you go on to live happily in your own skin. Even if, like me, you were never happy in the first place. Losing my hair, ironically has taught me to love what’s on the outside. Even better, it’s helping me to really value who I am too.
This isn’t artistic licence, or an exaggerated claim that if you buy my products you will find utopia. The truth is, if you are not willing to help yourself there’s nothing that I can do to help. I used to find this upsetting but what I’ve come to realise, is that everyone’s map of the world is different.
I’ve have had some crazy stuff bite me on the ass but, wholeheartedly, the most difficult things give me so much more than the stress ever took. Here’s my personal map (some examples of my thoughts from an average day):
1) More positive things than negative things happen
We are programmed to only notice and react to the negative. If you step back from it you’ll realise that actually many great things happen daily.
Yesterday I felt like I could have entered a competition for the worlds busiest person. I dash to pick the kids up from school, let them grab a snack, 2000 calories later we are in the car rushing to an appointment. I totally misjudged how long the journey would take. Instead of feeling angry with myself I thought about how I could manage the time better next time. On the rush home my littlest threw up the entire 2000 calories.
I arrive home with one child covered in, what looked like, scrambled egg and and a stench coming from the car which would have made your eyes water 5 streets away. I had 25 mins to get things sorted before collecting my eldest….who BTW has a very strong gag reflex for this kind of thing.
After my youngest showered and changed I start the glamorous clean up operation IN THE RAIN. During this time, my sodding dog escaped out of the garden. And in her classic disobedience, belts off. At this point I only had 10 mins before having to pick up my eldest. My calm had finally dissolved and just as I was about to lose the plot my fabulous builder goes to get her.I managed to remove the stomach contents from my car and drove to collect my child, thoughts only interrupted with the frequent spraying of fabreeze.
Oh boy did my eldest kick off about the smell. Whilst going absolutely mental he managed to hurt his head during an electric window protest. So he’s crying and kicking off in the back and I’m laughing in the front at how ridiculous the situation is.
2) Feel the pain but find something positive too
Ok, I totally get there are times that the negative becomes overwhelming. There’s no hiding from this stuff and it’s very damaging to do so. But even when I’ve gone through the worst, there are still funny moments. When you feel grateful that you hurt that much because something is that important to you. Or that times are tough but people really do want to help you. It still feels crap but the worst moments can be the most humbling. Some people can see them others can’t.
2) Small acts of generousity give you a buzz
Even if you don’t feel great, doing something for someone else can really help to restore your sense of self worth.
I love doing little unexpected acts. Yesterday my dog was the talk of the village shop because she managed to knock my bricklayers lunch down from it’s “safely” positioned perch, 2m high, on bags of sand. Today the same attack was launched on an innocently placed Mars bar. Â Between appointments I popped into the supermarket and bought him a whole cooked roasted chicken and a bumper pack of Mars bars. He was really chuffed, it was nothing major but it made all the difference to our days.
4) See it from someone else’s point of view
Did I mention that I’m having an extension? (YAWN). Have I mentioned the mud (LOL). The chaos surrounding my house has resulted in my desperate need to control what I can on the inside. It’s tiring me out. It hasn’t stopped raining, the mud is relentless, but how dare I complain when I look out and see those poor sods working in it!
What a different world we live in, where the mud from a big extension is causing me stress, whilst there are families packed into tents in Calais???
This was my really long winded way of explaining that your resilience to anything is entirely decided by how you choose to react to it.